Tuesday, March 22, 2011

The Awakening of Growth

My DW has pressured me for an entry for our gardening blog. For some reason, I have never felt interested in jumping on the bandwagon by signing up for a friendster, myspace, facebook, or any other social media accounts, because I find the idea of annoucing to the rest of the world what you are up to a little bit egotistical (this must sound a little bit shocking to those of you who know me well or for a long time, as you might say that this is so unlike the real me). Along that same line of logic and reasoning, I have also believed that blogging is a little narcissistic. However, I am an obedient husband, so here is my very first blog entry. I apologize first, if it comes across as egotistical, narcissistic, or self-indulgent!
 
I never really had any real interest in gardening, even though I spent many weekend days fertilizing and pruning the trees and shrubs in our deserty front and backyards. I just wanted to see the plants grow well (I was and am still very result-driven), and did not care too much about the actual gardening work or what and how the work could make me feel. In spite of this, I had always wanted to go back in time when everyone was just a farmer, growing their own food and making their own clothes, before modernization/technology started affecting the society.
 
When the veggie garden idea first surfaced many years ago, I thought it was a cool idea, but, for various reasons and excuses, chose to delay the implementation year after year. Finally, we both got our acts together, and decided to just give it a shot. We had planned to build the raised beds, but instead, spent the entire weekend cleaning up the yard. The weather was very nice, and for the first time, I truly felt the enjoyment of doing gardening work outside. I was not thinking about whether we would be successful in growing any edible vegetables; I was only thinking that it was nice to be in touch with nature, despite the fact we lived in a desert. We human beings were created to be spending a lot of our time outdoors in and with nature, instead of working in front of a computer in the office or watching TV in the family room.
 
During those two days of work outdoors, I felt more at peace with myself and had the yearning of living my entire life outside. I wished that I could just sit down to read a book outside, and promised myself that I would do just that over upcoming weekends when I was not working on the veggie garden. Unfortunately, the weather was not cooperating during the following weekend, and the typical spring wind storm forced us to be indoors. My mind, however, was calm, because of the outdoor work experience and what it made me feel. We walked the dogs, did some reading, and watched the seeds germinate and grow in those take-out boxes. There was no TV or any other distraction; we felt full in our hearts.
 
Since we started working on the gardening project, we have also been revisiting the idea of getting rid of our material possessions/accumulation. It was not the first time when we each got a free $10 gift card to Kohl's and found ourselves standing in the big store with nothing in our hands. We felt that we had wasted time driving to and entering the store, because we had better things to do at home, or outside. The lightness we feel when we are not attached to any material goods (except maybe the clothes we are wearning) is so delectable. It induces a great sense of inner well-being, making us appreciate each other's company and all the authenticity present in everything surrouding us.
 
This round of awakening (or re-awakening) feels more natural and long-lasting, thanks to the vegetables trying to grow. We are both confident that we will grow together with them.

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